time to get personal.

I’m going to get personal.
It’s going to be a long post.
<Deep breath>

Over a year ago I was not in a good place.
If you know my story, you know that I have struggled with depression for a long time.
This time last year I was on two anti-depressants to help with anxiety and depression.
It was okay. It helped. The side effects sucked.
(pardon my French)

I was also spending every weekend evening drinking too much.
And I don’t mean water.
I drank too much alcohol which is a no-no with anti-depressants.
I then would pass out or be sick.
Every weekend. And I had been doing this for a while.

I look back and think “how foolish!”.
What did my kids think? (yes, I’m crying as I type that.)
How did my husband feel having to take care of me?
Why did my friends remain my friends when I got drunk at their house and then sick at their house over and over? (I let those friends slip away despite their care and love.)

Last summer I began my journey to good health.
And I don’t mean just exercise, but really good health.
I wanted to be off of the anti-depressants.
I wanted to feel good.
I wanted to not drink so much on the weekends.
I wanted to be happy.
I wanted to be a good mom, wife and friend.

So I took a leap of faith.
I bought this bag of Shakeology with a paycheck from my cleaning job.
I was a skeptic but I was also ready. Ready to give it a try.

Within 2 weeks I was off of my anti-depressants.
I was renewed. I was excited about life. I was full of energy.
I was happy again. And I wanted to help others feel that too.
I knew I wasn’t alone.

So from that came a new career that stemmed out of my passion for this product.

I stopped getting drunk every weekend.
I started being me again.
It might sound silly, but it’s true: a shake changed my life–good nutrition changed my life.

And now, I’m a good example to my kids.
My husband doesn’t have to carry me around unless he wants to.
And those friends? I’m working on making that better to.

I still have times when I struggle with depression.
Like right now when it’s February (freezing cold) and I have too much on my plate.
I can’t do a damn thing about February (or the cold) but I now need to tackle that overloaded plate.
And in order to tackle that, I know I have to eat good food and exercise to take care of me.
I’d appreciate your prayers as I figure out a balance for life, family, work and home schooling.

But all in all?
Life is pretty darn good.


2 thoughts on “time to get personal.

  1. Amanda, thank you so much for sharing your story!!! I loved learning more about you and love that you are in a good place right now.

    I can relate to so much of your story, including the alcohol, anxiety and depression (and throw in some disordered eating along the way too). I currently Am on medication too. I started this Whole 30 to help reset my body and feel really good right now. I hope that continues.

    Anyway, I appreciate you opening up! And I tried the dvd today, whoa, good stuff! But my abs are no where near able to do what they used to do pre baby. Can’t wait to get back in shape! Leah


    • Thank you sweet friend! Whole 30 will be so good for you and as you begin to add exercise back into your life, you will feel so much better. I can’t tell you how lovely it is to have others who know what I feel…I don’t with it on anyone, but just knowing others “get” it is so wonderful. Thank you for sharing. I am so thankful for our friendship. (And i had no idea you had a blog too! How fun!) p.s. You rock, my friend.


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